Passenger or Driver...which one are you?

It's another Friday evening, the weather has been beautifully bright and I can feel the change of a season upon us...but it isnt coming quick enough, there is still a slight chill in the wind and in the shade I feel cold. I live in the country in an old Cottage. We have fields to the front and back of us and have a fairly large garden. Our outdoor spaces have always been and are important to us, they are an absolute blessing in the Summer. In Winter, the ground is wet, mushy and to be frank pretty miserable, so we indulge with an open fire inside and copious amounts of red wine ! Our cottage is my dream home, it is isolated whilst connected enough to the community around us, I love where I live and live where I Love. Yet this idyllic lifestyle is looking to change. Every where we drive, developments of new housing are taking place and housing assosciations from inner London are leading on the restructure of our landscape. I'm not against development 'perse' but when I learnt that the field opposite my home and the one at the back of us had been sold I was heart broken. For the life of me I can't understand why developers would want to build on a flood plane but, i guess we are an ever growing population and people need to live somewhere....money talks. Home owners will need to invest in a Dingy...that much is true.....

So now we have no choice but to look at our options - do we stay and lean into the change or do we get out now before the quiet country lanes turn into busy carriage ways? The nagging voice in my head reminds me that one consistent in life is inconsistency, and that my friends, does seem to be a bit of a trend in my world right now...

I work in a leading Childcare organisation and we pride ourselves in being 'People centred'. Wellbeing is a key priority and a worklife balance is fostered at all levels. To be fair, since the Pandemic hit , it has been easier to manage a flexible lifestyle as many of the operational and support staff can work from home and that in itself, offers a level of adaptability and availability.

Like all businesses, we have been hit economically by the closure of so many nurseries last year and not all have yet re- opened. This has impacted the amount of people in our work force and after a restructure last year, we said goodbye to many collegues who had been long term employees with us. This naturally creates a level of uncertainty around new partnerships and ways of working and, I am no different to anyone else when i say, that it takes time to get your feet back on solid ground. Change takes time.

Yet almost five months into the new year, the lockdown is still here and we are still experiencing a level of turnover as new opportunities lure peers away; some of whom we have worked with for years and years. It's really tough. The traditional 'Send off's' cant take place and the almost immediate 'loss' hurts. It feels never ending.......and maybe thats because the reality is that,  it is...never ending.

I often feel that change is easier to lead on emotionally when you have created it for yourself, when you have chosen it for yourself and have moulded the right environment for the 'new' to happen. But for me, this change is not of my own creation and once again I will need to re- start with a new team, adapt and re intergrate..... it feels...tiresome.

The challenge for me now is, how do I make my way onto the path ahead whilst trying to maintain a level of positivity on the situations facing me at home and at work?

I am mature enough to know that neither scenario will have an 'over night' solution. I don't yet have the answers but what I do have is time this weekend to reflect. The sun will be out again (apparently), I am going to walk...lots, and whilst I breathe in the peace of the countryside I will be able to think about how I can regain some element of self directed traction....because here's the thing, if I'm not the 'Leading Lady' in my own life ...then who the heck is?? It's time to get my 'Grit on!'